This is a big month for me. I'm turning 30 on November 19th.
I'm really excited for this next decade. My 20s were great, but there were a lot of rough patches, too.
I spent 7 years trying to figure out "my thing" without anything really working. I had moments when I was riddled with self-doubt, left questioning myself, my business, everything. I was naive and thought things should happen faster. But, I'm beginning to realize as I approach this next phase that the lessons I've learned were necessary and needed, and every "detour" was an essential one to bring me to this moment. Here with you.
There were, of course, ridiculously wonderful highs both personally and professionally, as well.
I married my amazingly supportive husband, our beautiful daughter was born, and I'm now so much more confident and clear in my business. A kind of confidence that I didn't even realize existed 5 or 10 years ago.
Overnight successes rarely exist. What we don't see are the years and years of dedication, the work, the highs and the lows. Do not get down on yourself if you're not where you thought you'd be in your business or in your life at this moment in time. This moment is just that, a moment. It's fleeting. Embrace it for what it is. Be thankful for all that you have (and will have). To quote a very smart lady, Marie Forleo, "Trust the timing of your life."
Everything is unfolding just as it should. You're on the swiftest, best path for you.
As I move into this next decade, one thing I know for sure is that the more I remain in the here and now, the more I live in and am grateful for this moment, the happier I am.
And, happiness is kind of the point of it all...isn't it?
On this month's HOT List I'm sharing resources that have helped my on my journey. I hope they serve you as well.
Mindset Reset Challenge
The most powerful tool we possess is our mind.
This is something I was taught early on in life (thanks Mom and Dad!), but have come to understand on a far deeper level over the past decade.
For me personally, the most profound change in my business came when I worked on my mindset. When I took the time to really investigate what I was saying to myself day-in and day-out about myself, my business, my potential, and the viability of my dreams.
When I tuned into the frequency of my thoughts, I realized I was too often living in a place of worry and lack. Even though I envisioned BIG things for myself, my inner dialogue wasn't consistently aligned with that vision.
Nothing profound, impactful and world changing ever came from living in a place of fear.
I realized that if I wanted my business to flourish and truly serve people, I could not remain small. I had to own my potential and live it every day.
Resetting your mindset is a daily practice. It's not something you address once, and you're good. You need to make space in your life to actively up-level your frequency so that you start living your fullest potential TODAY, not tomorrow or someday when you "make it".
With that in mind, I've put together a free 5-day Mindset Reset Challenge starting Monday, November 16th. During this 5-day Mindset Reset, you'll receive a daily teaching or tool that will enable you to realize your fullest potential, own it and start living it.
It's my birthday gift to YOU. May it be the catalyst that changes the course of your life for good!
I've gotten back into journaling lately. It's something that I've explored off and on again, and every time I come back to it, it feels like coming home.
If you have never journaled or haven't in a while, I strongly recommend you begin if you're interested in resetting your mindset to embrace the success that is YOURS for the taking.
Journaling gives you a window into your inner workings. When you transcribe your thoughts, feelings, ambitions onto paper in your own handwriting transformation can (and will) start to take place.
Especially if you're joining the Mindset Reset Challenge, I highly suggest that you get yourself a beautiful, NEW journal that you dedicate to this work of personal and professional development.
Money Affirmations
Can't wait for the Mindset Reset Challenge to kick off in a week and a half? Get a jumpstart on resetting your money mindset with 200 abundance affirmations.
I first heard about these particular affirmations from super-successful business coach, Emily Williams, founder of I Heart My Life. They're the ones she used to skyrocket her business to 6-figures in 6 months, and they're the ones I listen to as well.
If you believe with unwavering faith that you'll reach your fullest potential, change lives and be extremely successful doing what you love, you will. It won't necessarily be quick or even easy, but it WILL happen. I can guarantee it.
The best investment you can possibly make is self-belief. You have everything you need to reach your dreams.
xo,
P.S. The 5-day Mindset Reset Challenge kicks-off on Monday, November 16th. If you're ready to live your fullest potential every day, join the challenge now, and get the tools you need to make it happen!
Have you ever ridden the business crush roller coaster?
Come on. Don’t act like you haven’t had a business crush or two in your day.
I get them all the time, and they always start so innocently.
You stumble across a new blog, maybe after seeing the gal behind it featured on another site or interviewed on your favorite podcast. You peruse her content, read her posts, investigate her offerings.
Wow! This chick is really cool. I LOVE what she’s doing. She’s awesome. I wish I could hang out with her. I want to be her friend!
You’re totally smitten.
You sign-up and read every email she sends, feeling like it’s a personal note just to you and not a mass mailing to her thousands of subscribers.
You follow her on Twitter, like her page on Facebook, stalk her online whereabouts and daydream about attending her live event or taking her online program, just for the chance to befriend her.
There’s no denying it. You’re crushing hard.
For now, you’re still in the safe zone, but it could turn ugly fast. Watch out. I know, because it’s happened to me.
What do I mean?
One day you’re casually crushing, and suddenly there’s a shift.
You start comparing your stuff to hers.
She’s so much more innovative than me! I never would have thought to include that in my program.
That blog post was amazing - like she read my mind. I could never write something that spot on.
She’s so ridiculously good at what she does. I’ll never get to that level. Ugh.
Comparison is deadly. It makes you feel like crap and totally trashes your energy.
It’s just like that middle school crush on the hottie a few grades above you, when you went from being high-as-the-sky when he smiled at you to a mopey puddle of mush feeling sorry for yourself when you realized he didn’t know your name.
Business crushes turned bad can wreck your spirits.
But don’t worry, I’m not just going to leave you there, beating yourself for having the occasional business crush.
It’s perfectly normal -- and natural -- to admire the amazing work other awesome-preneurs are doing out there, but when you let it affect you negatively, that’s where we need to pump the brakes.
So, instead of allowing business crushes to turn ugly, I challenge you to harness that crushing power for good!
Here are some ideas:
Send your crush a little “love note” telling her that you admire the work she’s doing. (Who knows, maybe you’ll become actually friends with the gal you’re crushing on!)
Be inspired by her. If you love the way she writes, the look of her website, the head shots she has, the sales page for her signature program, ask yourself in what ways can you up your own game to appeal to your ideal client the way she’s appealing to you.
Spread the love. Remember how fun it was talking about your crush with your BFFs? Same goes for business crushes! If that gal you’re ga-ga for is inspiring/helping/motivating you, chances are her work will uplift your biz friends, Twitter followers and social media pals. Do her a solid and share her good work around! (Plus, you’ll be putting money in the Good Business Karma Account when you do :-)
Enjoy the crush (while it lasts), and squeeze as much positive ju-ju out of it as you can. And, when the time comes to move on, you’ll be left with the memory that it was good while it lasted.
Who’s your business crush? Spill the beans in the comments below so that I can start crushing on them too!
xo,
P.S. Stop crushing and start connecting! Find some real-life business crushes (that’ll soon turn into business BFFs) HERE.
We see the big picture, yet buckle down for the day-to-day.
We take the highs and the lows as they come (most of the time), and keep coming back for more.
It takes a lot to build a business out of nothing; to put yourself out there day after day.
When the entrepreneurial spirit lives within you, there’s no denying it. There’s no way a 9-to-5 kind of life will suffice. We think outside the box -- heck, we LIVE outside the box.
But, with all those amazing qualities, there is a dark side that I’m sure you’ve noticed at some point. An ailment that can compromise entrepreneurial gumption and leave you feeling depleted, worn out and confused.
Something so sneaky yet so prevalent, we almost don’t recognize it’s there, ruling us from the shadows. Showing up day after day. Draining our energy and confusing our decisions.
In fact, we come to think of it as a “given”, perhaps something that may even be helping us, but it’s really getting in our way. Tripping us up.
This ailment is so pervasive, I honestly don’t know if I’ve ever encountered an entrepreneur who wasn’t afflicted by it to some degree. (I know that it gets the best of me from time to time -- that’s why I felt like I needed to write this post!)
Maybe you have it too? Maybe you’re suffering from it right now...
GUILT.
I know I feel it. I know you do too.
It’s part and parcel for entrepreneurs (especially female-preneurs). It comes with the territory.
And it begins so innocently...in a subtle (almost good) way.
That nagging little bit of guilt drives us to work more, do more, be more. It pushes us to keep on keepin’ on. But, when the guilt takes up too much space in our lives, it can be devastating for ourselves and our businesses. And, it feels awful!
And no matter how much you love your business, your clients, your work, there are still days when the sh#t hits the fan. When the guilt (and everything else you’re dealing with) overwhelms you and leaves you feeling like...
Kristy Gardner While I LOVE my clients and my work, I never feel like I get away from work, and the lack of balance can make me want to curl up in a ball and hide in the back of my closet.
Kendra NasiatkaThe hardest thing about being an entrepreneur is working 24/7 and then feeling guilty when you take a break because you need one. You feel like you should just be going going going like the Energizer Bunny. The constant climb.
Hannah Poles Knowing where to start and when to stop is tough. It's very exciting (and also a little overwhelming) to be your own boss. I feel more pressure to work, work, work than I ever did in past jobs. I almost feel a little guilty when I take a break because, being a one woman show, everything falls on my shoulders and I want to be as successful as possible.
It can seem like we can’t win!
We feel like we’re not giving enough to our businesses, and in the same moment feel like we’re not giving enough to our families. We forgo self-care, meals and yoga class because we haven’t “earned it” or “should be working”. We feel like we should be further along in our businesses, have more figured out, be making more money, have a better website, have a bigger list, guilt, guilt, guilt.
We rush through our day trying to get our endless to-do list done, never taking a breath. We multi-task and consequently don’t show up fully anywhere. No good.
Perhaps, you feel like guilt is a motivator. And, maybe, in a bass-ackwards kind of way it is. But it motivates out of fear. It drives us with a whip and iron fist and feels, well, crappy.
Victoria Cunningham-Downey I feel this constant need to push myself when sometimes all I want to do is curl up into a ball and cry.
Entrepreneurship is tough enough without beating yourself up on top of it!
True and lasting motivation comes from holding the vision you have for yourself and letting your purpose pull you.
I know you know the difference between feeling guilted into doing something versus feeling totally motivated and pulled to do something. How would you rather function? (I know what I prefer!)
Honestly, the thing that helps me the most is knowing I’m not alone in feeling this way.
So, let me say that to you…
You are NOT ALONE in feeling this way. (And here's the FB group to prove it!)
Whether I’m having a high-as-the-sky-everything’s-rosy kinda day or a down-in-the-dumps what-am-I-doing-with-my-life day, I know every other person who has ever set out with a vision to make something out of nothing has felt that way.
Any person who has ever achieved anything remarkable, noteworthy or great has experienced times when they felt like a failure and guilty for not doing more, being more.
And, once you recognize that guilt is not a necessary state of being and that we can choose to move through our days and conduct our business differently, the shift has already begun.
Ridding yourself of guilt isn’t a practice to master. It’s a practice to practice.
You’ll likely never be completely rid of those momentary pangs of guilt you feel when you check your emails on your phone as your kid tries to vy for your attention, or when you feel that you shouldn’t stop for lunch because you’ve got too much to do. But, notice it for what it is -- a choice. Plain and simple.
I promise, your life and business will not fall apart if “this” or “that” doesn’t get done right now. Don’t postpone your happiness by carrying around the weight of guilt on top of everything else you do.
I, personally, want to start living the good life NOW. Not in 5, 10 or 15 years when I’ve “made it”. (What does “made it” mean anyway?!)
I’d rather do good work from a place of integrity on my own timetable than guilt myself into missing important moments with my husband and daughter to get “there” faster.
Is guilt something you struggle with as a business owner? I'd love to hear about your experience and any good coping techniques you've developed in the comments below.
Here’s to going guilt-free!
P.S. A BIG thank you to all the brave ladies who gave me permission to use their words in this post. I appreciate and respect your candidness and honesty. Sending virtual hugs your way xo
I recently surveyed my community, fellow entrepreneurs and the members of a bunch of groups I’m in on Facebook asking what the hardest thing is about being an entrepreneur. (And if you’re part of my Purpose-Driven Entrepreneurs Facebook Group, you may have seen or even commented on it -- Thanks!)
I got a number of responses like work-life balance, wearing too many hats, feeling guilty about working all the time, and not making steady money. But, the one that really caught my attention, and I want to address in today’s lesson is resistance.
A number of people said that they feel major blocks to working on their business, business projects and big ideas.
I’ve been fascinated by resistance for a while now for 2 main reasons:
(1) I definitely feel it (not all the time, but often enough), and (2) It seems at complete odds with my vision for my business, my life and how I want to move through the world.
So, what’s the deal?
Trust me, it's not that we lack willpower, motivation or drive. We wouldn't be entrepreneurs in the first place if that was the case!
So, why do we feel such push-back when we’re doing (or trying to do) work that we love, find meaningful and will make a difference not only in our own lives but the lives of others?
Hmmm...curious…
In today's lesson, I dive into the REAL reason purpose-driven entrepreneurs experience resistance. The truth is simple but surprising and will help you move beyond the resistance you're encountering in your own life right now.
I want to hear from you!
Do you encounter resistance when you're trying to work on your business? Share your story in the comments below -- remember, the recognition of resistance is the first step to moving beyond it, so, put it out there!
Oh, and in case you're itching for a copy of War of Art (it's sooo good!), you can check out my buddy Steven's book HERE.
